In life, some things are very partinent. Relationships has proven to be one of them. Over the years, relationships has portrayed itself as the strongest link among people. Sadly, most relationships in recent times do not possess certain materials that are instrumental to it’s longevity.

Consequently, it has been discovered, rather unfortunately, that most relationships are extremely short lived. This is because the patterns of relationships in these times differs from that of the ancient patterns. Fortunately, you have this beautiful piece to guide you.

Although we’re going into all the juicy details soon, it’s best we examine what a relationship really entails. Whenever the word ‘relationship’ is mentioned, what comes to mind is either family, spouse or partner. However, the word relationship is a lot deeper than that.

A relationship is an institution of association. In the sense that it is a point or an umbrella which covers all kinds of association. Obviously, there are different kinds of relationships.

The title includes the word ‘valuable’. When I say valuable relationships, I mean profitable relationships. Relationship that will birth growth and development in you and not retardation. Any relationship that isn’t adding to you is definitely stealing from you because you spend time and energy on such a relationship, right?

People go into relationships that somehow lasts for years without having a certain degree of knowledge about his or her partner. This is extremely pitiful. We must learn to define relationship so we do not waste our time on profitless things.

We’ll be looking at a few types of relationships.
1. Friendship.
This is the bedrock of every relationship. Friendship is basically the condition of being friends or being in a friendly relationship. Who then is a friend?

A friend is a person other than a family member, spouse or lover whose company you enjoy and towards whom you feel affection. It could also mean a person with whom you are vaguely or indirectly friends with. A good example is that a friend of a friend can be regarded as your friend but you aren’t well acquainted.

Reading through the definition of a friend, you can note that friendship is a relationship that has layers. It is the most popular and the oldest kind of relationship. It can take a life time to fully develop this kind of relationship.

Friendship, if properly managed, can last for years. It is usually characterized by platonic love. Partners here are referred to as; friends, pal, buddy e.t.c. The are practically family.

2. Consanguinity.
This is basically a family relationship. It refers to a relationship where partners are tied by parentage or descent. Naturally, this depicts a family setting. Here, partners are called brother, sister, uncle, aunty, niece, nephew, cousin, grandpa and grandma.

Although this relationship doesn’t require building up, it still needs to be strengthened to avoid being severed. The necessary ingredient to establish this relationship is blood. However, this isn’t the only ingredient.

One essential commodity is still needed to grow this relationship. Undoubtedly, there’s more to parenting than just giving birth. The essential commodity will be discussed later.

3. Affinity.
This is a relationship based on marriage. Relax, I’ll explain. It’s natural attraction or feeling of kinship to a person or thing. A good example is the sister of a man’s wife, his sister-in-law. They can call their relationship an affinity.

This relationship can also be described as any romantic relationship. In other words, dating and courtship fall under affinity. Basically, any relationship between people that isn’t platonic or consanguineous is definitely an affinity. Let’s note that the word, Affinity, cannot be converted to plural, past or future format. It’s just Affinity. Here, a partner is called wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend and many more.

I’ll like to also point out that courtship and dating are different. Courtship is the act of wooing a woman in love. It means to solicit a woman’s hand in marriage. Dating is a form of romantic courtship where two individuals aim at assessing each other’s suitability as partners for a longer lasting relationship. The main difference is that dating involves sexual activities but courtship doesn’t.


Someone may ask, “what about acquaintance?”. Shockingly, acquaintance is an important ingredient in all kinds of relationships. It isn’t a kind of relationship.

Acquaintance is a state of having intimate or more than superficial personal knowledge. In simple terms, acquaintance means to possess a deep knowledge about someone, personally. Obviously, it is of great essence in relationships.

Armed with the knowledge of the kinds of relationships, we can now look into necessary materials or ingredients needed to blossom a relationship. I know you probably have ideas like patience, tolerance and much more at heart. You aren’t wrong but there’s an umbrella that covers all.

That umbrella is LOVE. Love, though sounds simple, is the pillar of every strong relationship. A relationship is a commitment and all hands must be on deck to ensure the perfect success of that commitment. Love is what harmonizes ‘all the hands’. Love is the unifying factor.

Let’s look at 1 Corinthians 13:1- 8 (NLT version),
1.If I could speak in any language in heaven or on earth but didn’t love others, I would only be making meaningless noise like a loud gong or a clanging cymbal.
2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I knew all the mysteries of the future and knew everything about everything, but didn’t love others, what good would I be? And if I had the gift of faith so that I could speak to a mountain and make it move, without love I would be no good to anybody.

3 If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would be of no value whatsoever.
4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud

5 or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged.
6 It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.

7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
8 Love will last forever, but prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will all disappear.

A person who makes sacrifices shouldn’t be mistaken for a person who loves you. Sacrifices can be made to feel entitles. Sacrifices can be made to inflate one’s ego. Sacrifices can also be made to make someone feel indebted to you. Ultimately, sacrifices doesn’t translate to love.

No matter how ‘powerful’ you both spiritually and in the secular context, if you don’t have love, you are worthless. Love doesn’t look at power of faith. Love looks at you.

1 John 4:7&8 says, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is (springs) from God; and he who loves [his fellowmen] is begotten (born) of God and is coming [progressively] to know and understand God [to perceive and recognize and get a better and clearer knowledge of Him]. He who does not love has not become acquainted with God [does not and never did know Him], for God is love.” (AMP)

This is further explaining that if you do not have love, you are indirectly rejecting the image of God in you. Genesis 1:27 says, “So God created man in His own image, in the image and likeness of God He created him; male and female He created them.” (AMP)

Thia simply means that a person without love has made himself a bastard, sadly. If not for love, God wouldn’t persevere in his relationship with us despite our flaws. It’s only love that has kept God chasing after us.

However for a person to love genuinely, he has to have God’s love in him. God is the father of love and when you have God’s love in you, you will find it easy to love liberally.

Love shouldn’t just be an emotion. It should be a lifestyle. It should be the new normal. It should reflect in our speech, thoughts and actions too. To promote longevity in all relationships, love is an indispensable factor.

Finally, 1 Corinthians 13:13 says, “And so faith, hope, love abide [faith–conviction and belief respecting man’s relation to God and divine things; hope–joyful and confident expectation of eternal salvation; love–true affection for God and man, growing out of God’s love for and in us], these three; but the greatest of these is love.” (AMP)